


It's Just You And I

by raspberry_hairgel



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:48:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24194593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raspberry_hairgel/pseuds/raspberry_hairgel
Summary: "What do you see in your future?""What?" Kurt replied, lifting his head off his boyfriend's shoulder. The two boys sat in the otherwise empty auditorium after Mr Schue's talk about suicide and Karofsky's attempt."Mr Schue's exercise today. What do you look forward to in life that'll make you happy one day?" Blaine asked lovingly.-----The story of how Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson survived high school, college, multiple rounds of depression, self-harm relapses, and everything else life had to throw at them, and how they ended up oh, so very happy in their shoebox apartment in NYC with their new born daughter - the future Kurt always imagined they might be happy in together.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson & Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Kudos: 15





	It's Just You And I

**Author's Note:**

> (This note is kinda long, so feel free to skip)  
> Hi everyone!
> 
> If you aren't here from my instagram page, hi, I'm Ally :D
> 
> I absolutely love reading heavily angsty Klaine fanfiction. Over the past few months, and these past few weeks specifically, I've been feeling really depressed. I finally decided that I wanted to write my own angsty Klaine fic - nothing overly creative, but just a story of Blaine and Kurt's battles with depression (Kurt more so in high school, and Blaine more so in middle school and college). 
> 
> A lot of this fic is going to be heavily based off of many of my own experiences, so it is a very personal story to me. But I really wanted to write it because A) I love Klaine and B) when I'm having a worse day than normal, it normally helps me be able to relate to something/someone, even if it's a fiction character in a fanfiction. So, if you're here because you're able to relate, you simply like Klaine, or maybe you're my ibf and I forced you to read this, I wanted to say thank you for reading.
> 
> Before we start, I feel like I should include some disclaimers: first of all, just prepare for a bit of cheesiness. I'm sure I'll include many cliches, as well as references to things Darren or Chris related. Second, I apologize in advance for the many inevitable typos I'm sure I'll make throughout this fic. Lastly, I also apologize in advance if the general thought flow throughout the chapters is a bit all over the place. My mind wanders easily and I often find myself getting a completely different point across than I intentionally planned, then having to return to the original idea. I'm guaranteed to go off on many some-what related tangents, but I'll try my very best to make it all flow well together.
> 
> Okay, I don't want to bore you anymore, so I'll shut up now. Hope you enjoy!

> *takes place during 3x14, On My Way - Tuesday, February 21st, 2012*

"What do you see in your future?"

"What?" Kurt replied, lifting his head off his boyfriend's shoulder. The two boys sat in the otherwise empty auditorium after Mr Schue's talk about suicide and Karofsky's attempt.

"Mr Schue's exercise today. What do you look forward to in life that'll make you happy one day?" Blaine asked lovingly.

Kurt paused for a moment, thinking. He honestly hadn't given much thought to the topic. Sure, he knew he was going to grow up one day and move out, get a job, hopefully settle down somewhere and start a family with a loving husband, but he hadn't ever considered any of the specifics. If he was being honest, there were some days that Kurt experienced where he wasn't convinced he would ever be happy again. That he didn't _deserve_ to be happy. He knew logically that wasn't true, but that didn't prevent him from _believing_ it was true. Kurt's mind often worked in paradoxes. 

"I think about a future in New York City, either attending classes at NYADA, or even better, on a Broadway stage." Blaine couldn't help but chuckle. Kurt's ambition was one of the many things Blaine loved about him, even if Kurt sometimes needed a reminder that he could make it. Ever since their first meeting on the Dalton staircase, Blaine had been there to remind him that, no matter what, Blaine believed in him, even when Kurt didn't. 

"I think about... coming home to you everyday." Kurt watched intently as Blaine lifted their interlocked hands up to his lips, and kissed the back of Kurt's hand. Every time Blaine came over to the Hummel's house, he could never hold back the big cheeky grin that swept across his face when he saw the gum wrapper promise ring he made him for Christmas a few weeks ago. 

"And... I think about maybe a child with you. The three of us, living in a small shoebox apartment. Nothing special, but it would just be our special place." Blaine squeezed his hand, encouraging him to go on. "We could start a family. I could hold your hand in public and kiss you whenever I wanted to. I think I could be happy then." 

"Mmm" Blaine mumbled in response. The two boys sat in the comfortable silence, both imaging Kurt's vision for his possible future. _Their_ possible future. Because if there was one thing Kurt was most sure of about his future, is that he wanted to spend it with Blaine. Even if he didn't make it as a successful actor on Broadway, even if he didn't get into NYADA, Blaine would always be there next to him. However, there was one bit that Blaine just had to ask about.

"You really want that? A child, I mean, with me?" Blaine asked, looking at Kurt's green eyes. 

Kurt looked almost a bit shocked, as if the question was obvious. "I mean, yeah, I do." They had discussed their futures together many times, but they had never talked specifically about having a child together before. Kurt had always assumed Blaine had wanted to - Blaine loved children and Kurt had always imagined raising a son or daughter his entire life. "Do you not want to have a child with me?" Kurt asked quickly, afraid of the answer.

"Of course I do, Kurt," Blaine responded, and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "Of course, I would love to have a child with you. We've just never talked about it before." Blaine continued to cover Kurt's face with light kisses, making Kurt giggle. 

"I just think that," Kurt continued, "I could be really happy in that future."

"Yeah, I think I could be happy in that future too. _Together_."

"Together," Kurt agreed. 

Blaine let go of Kurt's hand to grab his face lightly, and pressed another kiss against the older boy's lips. 

"Common," Blaine said. "Lunch is almost over, we gotta go to class." 

Blaine stood up, and offered his hand to Kurt. Kurt grunted, not wanting this moment between the two of them to end. After Mr Schue's lesson on suicide and looking forward to a possible future, the two boys had stayed behind, obviously heavily affected. Both boys had managed to hold back most of their tears in front of the rest of the Glee club, but as soon as the others left, they had resided to the stage left wing to hold each other as they sobbed. Kurt had expressed both his love and hatred for Mr Schue's speech while Blaine comforted him through it all. Blaine was also crying, but he knew that Kurt needed him more in that moment. Even though both boys had felt very similarly to David at some point in their lives in that they considered ending their own lives, Blaine knew that Kurt blamed himself for David's attempt. Through his tears, Kurt explained that although he appreciated Mr Schue trying to teach the Glee club a lesson about sympathy and hope, he also disagreed with some of the things the teacher had said. _Disagreed_ wasn't the right word, more like, was generally annoyed with some of the key information he felt Mr Schue had left out.

His story about cheating on a test was incredibly moving, and Kurt did agree that everybody had that something that would bring them up to that edge. However, he didn't mention the people who didn't need a specific reason to end their own lives. He didn't mention the people that were so depressed in their everyday lives that they didn't see a point in living anymore. He didn't mention the people that hated their lives so much that they could barely find the motivation to get out of bed most days, the people who were in so much internal pain every day that they would rather not live at all than live and endure all this pain, the people who had convinced themselves that the world would be better off without them and that by ending their own lives, they would be doing the world a favor. He didn't mention the people like Kurt, who had felt all of these things on and off for the past few years. Sure, he knew that being gay in a pretty conservative city and being bullied due to his sexuality probably had something to do with it, but even after he had come out and the bullying had stopped, he still wasn't happy all the time. Even after he met Blaine, he still felt so worthless.

Yes, Blaine had been there for Kurt every step of the day. When Kurt could barely get out of bed, Blaine would still make sure that he didn't completely give up on himself. He made sure that Kurt showered at least every other day, that he always ate two, preferably three, meals a day, that he brushed his teeth before and after bed. Blaine had undeniably saved him, yes, but nothing could take all of Kurt's hurt away. Kurt still lived most days in pain. He had gone through months where his depression was more or less in remission - he could smile without feeling guilty, he could wake up in the mornings not completely dreading the day ahead of him, he could find a reason to get out of bed and just to _live_. But he had also gone through times where none of this was true.

But if Kurt had learned one thing during his life time, it's that time keeps moving on whether you like it or not. So, hesitantly, Kurt reached out and took Blaine's hand.

"Do we have to?" Kurt asking jokingly, already knowing the answer. 

"I'm afraid so. But hey, we only have two classes left today, and then we can go stop by the Lima Bean on the way to my house after school. How does that sound?" Blaine picked up his messenger bag from the floor, not letting go of Kurt's hand. 

Kurt smiled. "That sounds perfect. Thank you."

Suddenly, a young freshmen entered the auditorium, most likely in time for their drama class. Kurt quickly dropped Blaine's hand, whispered a quiet "See you later," and hastily walked out of the auditorium. 

Blaine stood there for only a moment more, envisioning Kurt's future where they could hold hands without fear of backlash. As much as Blaine had always been there for Kurt, Kurt had also always been there for Blaine. Blaine could still remember his feelings of hopelessness he felt his eighth and ninth grade year. _Nobody will miss me. I'd be doing everyone a favor. They probably wish I was dead anyways_. While those feelings had mostly subsided, he still felt them every so often and could definitely relate to Kurt's similar feelings that he still experienced. 

Blaine shook his head, knowing if he didn't leave now, he would be late to class. He took a deep breath to ground himself, and wiping the tears he barely noticed had collected in his eyes, he left the auditorium. He knew that he could and would get through anything, including Ms Wilson's English 11 class, for a possible future with Kurt.

* * *

> Sunday, June 21st, 2020 - Fathers Day

_"It's just you and I and our daughter."_

Blaine played the final chord on their piano, the same one Blaine and Sam had gifted Kurt and Rachel all those years ago as a thank you gift. He looked up to see his husband of five years holding their new born daughter, only a week old, in his arms. Kurt was looking at him with tears in his eyes, obviously moved by the song his husband had written over the past few weeks. 

"That was beautiful, Blaine," the countertenor said, wiping the tears that were falling on his cheeks. 

Blaine stood up and slowly made his way over to his husband and daughter - his _family_. He wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist, who was still coddling Hepburn in his arms.

"Kurt," he whispered, his eyes flashing between looking into Kurt's beautiful green eyes that he could get lost in and the hazel eyes of baby Hepburn. He didn't dare speak above a whisper; this was a moment he wanted to share with his family and no one else, and speaking any louder somehow felt less intimate. Kurt searched Blaine's eyes, begging him to go on.

"I'm so happy right now, Kurt." Blaine confessed, a few tears trickling down his cheeks. He didn't even try to hide the cheeky grin on his face. "I didn't think I could ever be this happy."

This was it. Blaine had done it. _They_ had done it, the two of them. Even through multiple rounds of depression, self-harm relapses, two break-ups, and everything else life had thrown at them, they had done it. This was them, Kurt and Blaine, living in a shoebox apartment in the greatest city in the world, both with successful careers in the arts, holding their newborn daughter, and _happy_. 

"I'm so happy too, Blaine," Kurt confessed, also in a whisper. "We did it."

"We really did, didn't we?" Blaine asked, chuckling. 

Kurt pressed his lips to Hepburn's forehead, before turning back to Blaine and kissing him deeply. 

"I love you two so much," Kurt added.

This was it. They did it. This was their happy ending. 

**Author's Note:**

> Well, what'd you think?
> 
> Basically, this story takes place over many many years of Kurt's and Blaine's lives. If it wasn't already made clear, let me explain just a bit more about this fic:
> 
> So, basically, both Kurt and Blaine struggle with depression, which pretty much follows canon. We definitely saw Kurt's struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts in a few of the episodes near the beginning of his sophomore year, and we know Blaine got really depressed after their season 6 break-up, as well as possibly after his season 4 break-up. 
> 
> In this fic, it's going to be a lot of back and forth between Kurt's struggles in high school and Blaine's struggles in college (after the wedding, Blaine's depression gets better, but it's still definitely there. A few years later in 2019 and 2020, he goes through another rather bad "round" of depression). The story is going to focus a lot on the parallels and differences between their two experiences. I'll try my best to not make it too confusing with the timeline - I don't think it should be too hard to follow hopefully. I'll make sure to include the date before every bit, and the order of events should hopefully be pretty clear.
> 
> Also, I can't promise that I'll upload a ton over the next two weeks, I just really wanted to get this prolouge out as soon as possible. My school year ends in two weeks though, so after then, I promise to try and upload frequently. I don't have anything better to do during quarantine (if you're for some reason reading this in the future, you gotta love coronavirus), so I'll probably be writing a lot and/or posting on my fan account.
> 
> And if you're not already here from my instagram account, my main fan account is @raspberry_hairgel if you want to check it out.
> 
> One last thing - if you guys wanted to leave a review, that would be amazing. Any type of feedback would be great - if you loved it, if you hated it, if you have suggestions, if you have questions, if you have advice, anything like that, I'd love to hear it! :D
> 
> (Also the song Blaine sings in the last bit that will appear again in full at the end of the fic is a song called "You and I" by Andrew Barth Feldman - you can find it on YouTube. The actual lyrics are "son" instead of "daughter" but in my headcanon, Klaine has a daughter so I just changed it to make it fit. I highly recommend listening to it, it's an incredible song.)


End file.
